The wisdom of seventh graders: What to do with a time machine (part 2)

Raymond Chen

(Make sure you’ve read Part 1 for background information.) On the subject of where they would go in a time machine, many students wrote well-thought-out essays, beautifully composed. These sentences below did not come from those essays. I’ve categorized the snippets roughly by theme, though I had to guess at some of them since the sentences are taken out of context. (In a futile attempt to assist non-native speakers, I have glossed some of the trickier parts. I’ve also added editorial comments in italics.) Introductions

  • I would be honored to trie the time machine
  • I am highly regarded to be selected to engorge this experimental journey.
  • At the crack of noon, we will begin our mission.

Personal History: These are essays from students who would travel to their own past.

  • In 5th grade you are at the top of the school, and you feel the power over come you.
  • Now, if we fall asleep in class we get in trouble. But in kindergarten if we didn’t fall asleep we would get in trouble.
  • She would work in little orchids picking fruit for her family.
  • I have 4 things in my life. Soccer, family, God, and school. In that order.
  • If I could find a way to impel paranormal powers to ignite in ones body enableing them to do incredible feats, I would be ecstatic to the point of bliss. (This same student wanted Jesus to teach him how to walk on water. This student also wanted control over magnetism. I think he needs to lay off the X-Men comics for a while.)

The Middle Ages: The students recently studied the Middle Ages, which helps to explain why so many of them chose to go there.

  • And at that time in history, everything was changing either for the good or the bad. (Whoa there, let’s not say anything too controversial now.)
  • In Europe during the 1700’s there were 5 sections in the social class: 1=Monarchs, 2=Lords & Nobles, 3=knights, 4=pheasants. (What happened to number five?)
  • I find Middle Aged Europe very stimulating.
  • France is near water so I will feel more at home.
  • We have recently disgust the Middle Ages.
  • King Arthur may have won some battles without the use of fiction.
  • In 1550 I would choose to go to Spain because nobody really lived in N. American then.
  • I would learn a lot gong to the Midieval times. I would even come back and write and essay about it!
  • I’d have benefit in watching a mock battle between two knights on horseback with lances. (I may be wrong, but I think the battles in the Middle Ages were for real.)
  • It was sick and grusm but really a thing to remember.
  • And I would go to Britan because Britan was populare back in 1616.

United States(?) History

  • Also, to investigate how the family worked [in Pilgrim times], to see if they fought less because they had no appliances to fight over.
  • If I could go anywhere I would choose Boston, England.
  • I want to see what happened when Ben Franklin flew his kite in the rain. For this reason I would go to England.
  • Though War is Hell, I still would be anxious to see a real one. (Try watching the evening news.)
  • I wish the great depression, but it did. (Even after you fill in the missing words, it’s still funny.)
  • Because California is a very interesting and mindblowing city.
  • In 1961 everything including life was simple.
  • Hopefully the president at their time isn’t an idiot and stops the first power plant ever built.
  • I want to se the Great Babino Babe Bruth.
  • Besides the Stealer fans nobody like the Stealers.
  • It was like a family runnun at disneyland.

I’ll stop here before I runnun too much. We’ll learn more about seventh graders and time machines in the next installment.

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