The wisdom of seventh graders: Being President

Raymond Chen

Today is Election Day in the United States. Some years ago, seventh grade students (age 12) were asked to imagine they had just been elected president and to give an address to the nation on one thing they would change.

Remember, these are only the most entertaining ideas. Do not assume all student ideas are like these.

  • Ban “all types of non-purpose car racing.”
  • Defend against zombie attack.
  • Withdraw from Iraq and use the money to fund electric cars and ban smoking.
  • Repeal all taxes.
  • Name Arnold Schwarzenegger as Vice President.
  • Shorten all school days to increase learning.
  • Build a holographic wall at the border. For the immigrants who don’t fall for it and run right through, station border patrol just behind it.
  • Shut down all cigarette factories. “If you somehow manage to get cigarettes, we don’t care.”
  • Make chocolate milk the official drink.

And this sentence came from a student destined for greatness as a politician: “Something must be done, and I will make it happen.”


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