NPR reported on a startling discovery in Chicago: That government jobs go not to those best qualified to perform them, but rather to those with the best connections. Who’d-a thunk it?

Shocked by this discovery, the Daley administration vowed to end it.

The City of Chicago’s top lawyer Mara Georges told incredulous City Hall reporters yesterday that the hiring system will now be completely fair, objective, and free of political influence. “City hiring will be on the square, yes.”

The Associated Press notes that “City officials have long denied that political favoritism or patronage had anything to do with who got jobs.” The Chicago Sun-Times captures the sentiment quite succinctly: Who knew politics as usual in Chicago is against the law?