Chess has become elevated to the gold standard of board games. Everybody wishes their game had the cultural gravity of chess, a game whose mere mention elevates you to the category of deep thinker and profound strategist. (We’ll set aside the scrawny glasses-wearing nerd part for now.)

I’ve learned that when somebody says a game is like chess, it’s pretty much guaranteed that the game in fact bears no resemblance to chess whatsoever.

I came to this realization when somebody pulled out a game with a strange-looking board with what looked like plastic volcanoes glued to the surface, catwalks, and a lazy susan. Each player was represented by a token, set in its respective starting position. I asked, “Hey, what’s this game?”

The person replied, “It’s a lot like chess. First you roll the dice…”

(Translation from the German in that link above, for those who need some help.)

[Raymond is currently away; this message was pre-recorded.]