What seventh-grade students want to be when they grow up

Raymond Chen

Another episode in the sporadic series on the wisdom of seventh graders: The topic this time is “What do you want to be when you grow up?” The students really enjoyed this topic because, as one young man put it, “I could write a book about myself!” Here are what some students had to say. Spelling mistakes are intact, but ellipses are editorial. (I have provided tooltips to assist non-native English speakers. Actually, even native English speakers may have trouble with some of the spelling errors…)

  • The best job in the world would be a dog consultant.
  • I also watch the history channel because you can never know too much about history.
  • My talent would be having good mojo.
  • In science I am achieving an easy A, and hardly giving it my all.
  • I like to blow up stuff.
  • Couciling teens is a low stress job, and you get paid a lot of money.
  • I am very interested in rockets and their purpltion sistims.
  • Also my dad does not believe I will be able to become a dentist so my goal is to prove him wrong and become a dentist.
  • I want to be a arcetecture.
  • Theories can turn into farts by proving it.
  • I’ve been called short and weird, but no one has ever called me chicken. In fact, if I were a chicken every chicken would call me “backa” or “cluck-chirp“.
  • (From a male student) Also another reason good pay is important is because if I get married and have kids… I want to buy them nice things. For example, a wedding ring, dress, food… an alarm system…
  • There is no better job then getting paid to argue.
  • (About being a doctor) You get to help them by saving their life or getting a lego out of their throat and are rewarded with joy.
  • I would slide down the helicopter ropes and bust in to save the day.
  • Creating is creativity.
  • There is now whining or crying in 5th grade.
  • I have went to every Huskie home game in the past 5 years.
  • I wanted to be a writer, but writing this paper makes me think I shouldn’t.
  • I will understand that no matter the child, the punishment will fit the crime. No student will be left behind.
  • I have the natural ability to become frustrated.
  • I will have a sufficient retirement if I don’t go bankrupt.
  • (About being an architect) Make everything extremely simple… architects have to deal with the puenie minded construction worker around them.
  • My ways of teaching will make life and school a lot easier, I will clearly write my name on the whiteboard, in purple ink and I will have a neon green poster board with the rules written on it.

Bonus misspellings: omocinal, nurcher, pation, mussuse. (And I thought I didn’t have to say this, but apparently I do: These are just the funny-bad sentences. There were of course plenty of well-written essays, but they’re not as funny.)

Bonus explanation: In the previous series of essays on humanity’s greatest invention or discovery, one of the responses was “marrying a princess”. I had to ask my friend for an explanation of that one. “Well, one student decided to ignore the assigned topic and instead wrote a fairy tale about a beautiful princess who gets married.”


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